New Year.. New Me??

How many times have I said, this is the year I'm going to lose it all??? How many times have I set goals and failed?? .... okay let's not think so much about that.. I know deep down I have to keep in mind how many times I've succeeded. 7 years ago I was pushing the scale at 350... 350lbs!!! Now I'm 126 pounds lighter... but nowhere near where I want to be. I was really happy 18 months ago at my brother's wedding.. I lost an extra 30 pounds for that.. and this past year I gained it all back.. I broke up with my boyfriend, got a promotion, and moved into my brand new house... a lot of stress, and mindless eating, coupled with the fact that I stopped working out when I was with my Ex.. So now here I am.. not so happy with the way I look, but bound and determined to lose it all.. so my goal for this year??? To lose that 30 pounds I gained.. It's definitely doable, they say the average person can lose 2 pounds a week.. at 52 weeks.. crap that's 104 pounds.. so I should definitely be able to lose the 30... 

Now are you wondering what I've done these first 4 days of the year? Well January 1 & 2 I was in bed.. sick.. no it wasn't self induced, I actually started the year with a horrible Sinus cold that knocked me right out.. So I can't really count those in. Yesterday I joined Weight Watchers (AGAIN!!! 3rd time.. yikes!) and met a girl who told me about this website.. I also bought "Dance Dance Revolution" for my wii.. and believe it or not, I had some friends over last night to play.. my goodness I'm bad.. but this morning I played for an hour on my own and was sweating like crazy... So.. that coupled with my gym membership.. I'm praying I can get back into working out, and hopefully be successful...... 

This really isn't going to be easy is it?? 

I think I'm getting exhausted just thinking about all the work that is going to go into this... 

However I believe I'm going to be successful this year.. I don't want to keep saying I want to lose weight.. I just want to do it.. I'm 28 for goodness sake.. No longer a spring chicken.. I want to have kids.. and be healthy when I do so.. and teach them how to also be healthy.. 

How bad is it that as I type this all I want to do is eat some chocolate.. oh my.. this is going to be rough... 

signing off for today. 

wish me luck!!!!!