Just A Bit About Me....

My photo
Kitchener, ON, Canada
Well I'm the typical fat girl that everyone has as a friend. I'm funny, Sexy, Smart, and never a threat. I am on a journey to lose weight ( a lot of it!) and become the best Mummy to my son that I can be!... I'm sure there will be several times I stumble and fall, but follow me as I pick myself up, and continue along my way!

Monday, June 29, 2009

Oysters and Life..



Hello there fellow bloggers!!!!

Today I realized that I have a great life... sure I'm not thin, I'm not rich, I don't have a man, and I don't see kids anywhere in the near future... But I do have  a great life.. 

Shall I explain? 

I go through phases of feeling lonely, feeling like I'm lost in the big crowd in the city where I live. I'm a small town girl, living 2.5 hours away from my family... 2.5 hours away from life that I know.  
But now, I've got an amazing group of friends here. Not only the ones I made in my work fish bowl (as in we're only friends because we were stuck in the fish bowl and they were the ones that offended me the least...) but also friends that I've made in my Weight Watchers fishbowl.. those girls I love so much.. I didn't need to become friends with any of them, it's not like at work where you have to be friendly.. otherwise life gets very hectic and stressful .. but the girls at WW, the select few that I deem "worthy" of my friendship.. they are great! Funny, real women.. 

I'm at a strange age, basically everyone I know is married with kids... which is cool for them, but since I'm so horribly single, it sometimes gets hard. I envy their "happy" marriages, and beautiful families.... and yet they tell me how much they envy my life.. not having to answer to anyone, making plans on the fly, staying out as late as I  want and spending my money on myself... 

As of Friday morning I had NO plans for the weekend at all, by friday at noon I had plans for dinner and a movie that night, Driving to the Toronto Zoo to meet a friend Saturday around Noon, then we went for Supper that night.. yesterday was Lunch with some WW girls, and then a movie with a girlfriend yesterday afternoon, and then hot tubbing and wine drinking with some girlfriends last night.. can a married gal, or mother do all that spur of the moment?? 

I am looking forward to where life is taking me. The world is truly my Oyster.. now it's time to devour it! :)

It's been raining all day, and now just when I have to start getting ready for work it gets nice out! Yikes! Isn't that just the way life goes? 

Have a fantastic evening people!
xoxo

Saturday, June 27, 2009

I'm Still Alive!!!!



First of all I want to apologize for my 2 week disappearance!  I was uber consumed with work this past week, and was on holidays for the majority of the week before. 

So the pictures to the right... the first was taken December 26, 2008 with a dear girlfriend... I can't believe how big I am.. the other was taken a week ago..  I can't believe how much healthier I look, my skin is glowing, my whole self is happier...  I am sooooo glad I've been able to accomplish this! I think I look hot, if I do say so myself! LOL

So I had an "Aha" moment this past week..  I have to pay attention to the "BIG PICTURE" and stop focussing on this weight watchers weight loss only..  

When I was 21 I weighed in at well over 300 pounds, and now look at me.. I'm in the 180's! What a HUGE accomplishment! 

Last week at Weight Watchers I gained 0.8, I was on vacation and was so afraid I was going to overeat, that I actually under-ate, and then I didn't drink a lot (if any) of water, that filled with a night of sushi, on thursday with my best girlfriend, I was just destined to gain weight.  So I left the meeting knowing that it would be an easy fix... 

This past week I was SURE I had GAINED.. although I never strayed from the Points Plan, and didn't go over my daily points (well one day, by 2) I just felt like I had gained.. all week I had been craving different foods, but never gave in.. I even had 2 glasses of wine this week! 
SO this morning at weigh in time I told myself I'd do better next week, got on the scale, and found that I had LOST 2.2lbs this week!!! 

I'm only 1.2 pounds away from hitting 40 pounds!! That's sooo awesome, I'm so happy and proud of me!  I feel so blessed to go to such a wonderful meeting, with wonderful girls who have now become close friends, and an amazing leader!

I've been going since January 3rd of this year, and haven't missed a meeting yet, and I truly do believe it's the secret to my success, I've found that I have a fantastic support system... a foundation for my personal "renovation".. 

Anyway kids, I know this blog wasn't funny or all that entertaining.. 
I mainly wanted you to know I am still alive and feel horrible for not coming back to the blog world for 2 weeks! I will make it up to you I promise!! :)
Hope you all have successful days, 
xoxo







Sunday, June 14, 2009

Feeling Great, Looking Better! ;*)

I have to issue a warning.. the following blog is extremely vain.. so if you don't want to read about how wonderful I feel and look, well you need to skip on to the next blog you follow!

I lost another 2.2 pounds this week. Taking me to a WHOPPING 37.4 pounds lost, I'm almost at my halfway mark.. (Still not sure if I'm going to make 140 or 145 my ultimate goal.. will decide when I get to 155.... notice how I said "when" and not  "if".. ahh self confidence, what a beautiful thing!)... I want to hit the 20% goal by July 13th, so that's another 7 pounds to get to 44 pounds lost.. yikes.. I can't wait!!!

So yesterday I decided I needed to buy a fun summer cotton dress.. now black isn't really the colour I was thinking of, but I fell in love with the way this dress looked on me.. It's a cotton dress that comes to my ankles.. with a cute pair of flip flops.. ahh.. and maybe some fun silver jewelry.. I'm gonna be a freaking knock out! ($34.50 Canadian at Old Navy)..    I felt so good trying on that dress, it's a LG.. Oh my!! I love being a large, I really do, I've never been a large before!!!!  I also realized I needed new Gitch (some call them panties, some call them undies, I call them gitch... ).. so I went to my favourite store for them... "Aerie" .. ahh.. I cannot wait to wear some that fit! Haha.. probably TMI right? Oh well.. at least I didn't tell you how I have to get all new bras now too, because the girls are getting smaller..        :o(

I feel like I've got my MoJo back, I feel like I can start to motivate and support others again!

Funny enough I didn't get to the gym as much this past week, or the week before.. I think I really was pushing myself too hard! So.. I'm still going to do 4 days this week, but 2 intense and 2 light.. 

I have holidays this week, and have them totally jam packed.. ahhh.. I love holidays! Monday and Tuesday I have to work, but how great it's going to be to wake up on Wednesday and know I've got a full 5 days to myself! :)

Well I need to take my skinnier ass to bed, I hope you all have successful weeks.. 
Can't wait to weigh in again! LOL.. only 2.6 pounds away from hitting the 40 pound mark.. Wowzers!!!  I'm on top of the world again kids!

Have a fabulous and skinny week! :)
xoxo

Saturday, June 6, 2009

Can I get a Hell Yeah??


Who will be the first to congratulate this girl? 


BOOYAH!


I have pushed past this freaking plateau!!!!! I lost 2.0 this week, and am into the 180's.. can I get a HELL YEAH! Weighed in today at 189.0!!! 35.2 pounds lost.. I'm feeling pretty darn good! Love working towards each 5 pound increment!

I feel so damn proud of me!

Thanks to everyone for the encouragement and support when I felt like a mixed bag of crap!

I am having a lot of stressful issues in life right now, but I am not going to turn to food and binge.. instead I am going to take it all in stride and work on making me better!

Sorry this is such a short blog, but I am about to leave for a date. .. yay me! LOL

hope you all are having a kick ass weekend!

Now onto the next 5 pound goal! 
Cheers!
xoxo

p.s all this working out is making me tired.. time for a nap! :)

Thursday, June 4, 2009

Oh Yeah! That's Right Baby!

Wow!

Talk about a complete 180... I'm feeling like I'm back on top of the world. I'm a shining ray of freaking sunlight baby!

Despite how frustrated I was feeling, I am so proud of myself, for not once did I stumble. I didn't cheat, I didn't binge, I didn't stop going to the gym, I didn't give anything but 100% at the gym.. 

However, something was lacking.. and despite thinking I was the nutritional guideline queen, I was lacking in some very important foods, and vitamins (what vitamin C? Who needs that? LOL).. 

So it's been a humbling experience... but I'm coming out ahead!

I'm just finishing up week 2 of the C25K program, and I gotta admit, I'm kicking ass! I am loving it! I did 5K with an extended warm up and cool down in 42.01mins! Pretty damn great for this girl! Who knew I could run comfortably at 6.3 mph?? Yay Me!! LOL

I have to tell you I had a MEGA uplifting moment when my Weight Watchers leader emailed me the day before we had coffee.. she told me that she sees me being a fantastic Weight Watchers Leader once I've hit my goal! Oh my goodness! 
Now to be honest, this isn't something I've ever really considered.. I love encouraging people, and helping them, but I don't know if I can dedicate that much of me to someone else.. 
However, to have her tell me that, well, not to sound like a total snob, but I think that speaks volumes into the kind of person I am. 
I also had a guy at work (who in all reality is one of my best friends now...) tell me last night that he can tell why some guys get crushes on me, and I quote "you're so pretty and it's always fun talking to you.. and when I have a problem, you really listen and help me figure things out... "..... Um.. AWWW

Maybe this is what I needed.. Maybe I needed to get to a point where I had to REACH OUT FOR HELP  and have my people stand behind me and encourage me for a change.. 
I feel like this is going to happen again.. I feel... well .. Freaking Awesome!

I'm not expecting to see a big number this week, why? Well it's Thursday, and this change started on Wednesday, but weigh in is on Saturday.. gotta be realistic here folks! I do know this though, I will see big numbers in the big picture.. 

I've set out my new goal.. to hit 20% by July 11 (My work has a "Shut-Down" week that week.. so it's a good time to set a goal for! A wonderful week of Vacay!).. so that's 44.8 pounds.. 6 weeks to lose another 12 pounds.. egads..  we'll see if I can do it.. if not, I'm okay with it, but it's something to work towards folks! You gotta have goals, even if they are slightly un-attainable! 
And... as I just figured out, that's gonna take me into the 170's.. oh my! Scary! .. okay I'm gonna worry about breaking into the 180's first.. then look towards that, but it is my next goal!

Okay kiddies.. this girl needs to take her butt to the shower.. think I'm gonna take a long bubble bath!

Hope you all have terrific Thursdays!
xoxo

Getting my mind back into the game..


This morning I went to Starbucks to have a coffee (well a peppermint tea...) with my Weight Watcher's leader.  
I am THRILLED I went! 
She is such an encouragement to me! She told me what she sees in me.... the effect I have on all the other people in my Saturday morning meeting.. how she sees me succeeding.. 
She also told me that I need to stop putting up with other people's bullcrap, and focus on ME!!!
So I'm going to do just that!
I changed up my eating a bit too.. adding some complex carbs (whole wheat couscous) and more veg and fruit. 
Funny enough, tonight after work all I wanted was McDonalds.. or Chocolate.. or chips.. or cookies.. I wanted Junk, but instead I kept thinking about everything Nancy said to me, and knew that I have to keep my eye on the prize! I have to do this for me.. 
 
I HAVE TO WANT THIS BAD ENOUGH!

I hope that this changes everything for me.. 
I can't stand this slump! This plateau! This kick in the nutts! 
Sorry for this short blog, 
I need to go to bed!
love you all!
xoxo

Monday, June 1, 2009

Are You Freaking Kidding Me???????

OMG!
WTF!


Sheesh! What do I do differently? I worked my butt off like mad last week. I worked out like a wild woman, ran 3 days of the week, did my weights, and came out of it 0.4 pounds lighter... 

Yes so I lost, I get that... but 0.4? I can't believe it! I've been trying to get into the 180's for a month... what am I doing wrong?  It's all gotta be the diet.. maybe I'm not eating enough points.. crap!

I never eat my activity points, I just have such a hard time eating the extra food! So today I added 2 extra points again to my daily points, and I changed up what I eat. Still very healthy, but more whole grains and veg... 

all I want right now is chocolate! CRAPPOLA! Lord help me get through this week and not over do anything!

My post is horribly boring, I'm sorry.. I just don't have it in me.. I have been so successful for so  long, and now here I am failing! Grr Freaking Arggg!

I'll post again when things are better in my mind! lol

Week 2 on the C25K challenge is on.. I did a fantastic job today and was able to do the 5k in 41.43... last week I did it in 45.26.. so I'm doing much better!

Hope other's are succeeding!
Take care!
xoxo