Self analysis

I have to admit, after the weekend I had I really need to get my butt in order.  I need to get my ass off the couch and work out very hard.. I'm nervous about the weigh in on Saturday, I kinda want to skip it in hopes that by the time I weigh in at the very end of the month I will see some kinda results.. 

I can't believe I've gone the ENTIRE month of February with NO results (the two pounds I lost... well I gained one back.. so a month and only one pound!!!!)... it's so off putting.

I know I can do this, I just need to get my head back into the game. 

Why am I falling off the wagon? 

Good question.. 

I'm thinking that it's because I'm freaking out over money, men, and weight (is their an M I could have used for weight?? mass perhaps?)... So money.. well lets just say I get paid well, but no extra over time really shows up on my pay cheque.. and now I have to use that dreaded word... "budget" gulp!!!! So then there's men..  Why do men say they are going to call and then don't.. but finally do at the end of the weekend with the excuse of why they were too busy to call? I mean, I totally believe them, but at the same time, is that my naivety ? ? ? Should I believe them? Do I want to believe them, because I want to be wanted?? 

Also on the Men aspect.. my ex just doesn't get the hint. He keeps messaging me and emailing me, telling me that when I'm ready he's here, when I'm ready he'll marry me.... YIKES!!!! Last night I broke down and messaged him.. thank God he didn't respond... but alas, he will get the message and then I'll have to make up some story about being drunk.. lol..... weakness sucks!!!

And I don't need to explain the weight thing.. you all know that story! Too bad  the other two (money and men) play such and influence on the weight... Oh my oh my oh my!

Well kiddies.. I'm going to put another load in the washer, and then get into my workout duds.. and then go workout.. definitely have to kick my own ass today!

Have a great Tuesday. 

xoxo